so what I ended up doing was getting a Grace m901, which Dough Oade is going to modify for me. Something w/the analog output path that will greatly open up the soundstage ...says he.
im going to get it here first, listen to it for a while ( i've heard one, and I know I like it) before sending it down to GA for some Oade magic.
but..this does everything for me only w/o a remote.
welcome to high end.
a nice analog stage on the 901 will allow me to try out the Audio Experience phono preamp i've been wanting to play with.
analog will survive...for a while longer, in our home.